Shut up and take my money!

What up jolly people?

Ever been to L’Occitane en Provence? They sell body stuff like shower gels, soaps, creams, etc. from France. They have the cutest little timeline on their site and the dork in me ate it up. They’re all about responsible buying and philanthropy and lavender from Haute Provence.

So at this point I have no idea what I’ve told you about my obsessions but… lavender. That’s pretty much it. I have a serious obsession with lavender. I love the color and the smell and the taste. I love it so much that I convinced an old friend of mine to pick lavender cupcakes for her wedding. Then, my cousin Jen the Amazerful randomly found lavender sparkling water at Home Goods and bought it for me. Big mistake and/or the best thing that’s ever happened to me in my entire life because I then went to every Home Goods, TJ Maxx, and Marshall’s from here to a very far away state and bought everyone I could find. I consumed them by the case and then I couldn’t find it anymore except online for a lot of money plus shipping. Sad sure but not to worry because I started making lavender simple syrup from scratch. With said simple syrup, I made lemonade, gin and tonics, soda, and other cocktails. Are you impressed? You should be. Everyone else is. Also I have lavender candles and lavender body oil and lavender pillow mist and basically it never ends.

I’m off topic. The point is L’Occitane has the best french lavender smelling goodies. I wandered into one of their locations by chance and the sales associate convinced me to buy a lavender relaxation roll on. It’s amazing. I kept it in my purse and would use it throughout the day and before bed. Basically, I used it whenever I remembered I had it. I eventually I ran out so I went to L’Occitane over the weekend to buy a new one. This, folks, is where it’s gets… real.FullSizeRender

World, meet my dresser. Already full of too much smelly stuff. I love smelly stuff.  Also, this picture is weirdly red cause it’s an iPhone pic. Also, if you look closely you can see me,in work garb, taking said iPhone pic.

This is my dresser after L’Occitane shopping:

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In all fairness, I only purchased the lavender bits. That little Lavande box is the lavender roll on. I can’t seem to find it on their website which is odd because I’ve been buying it for years. That big bottle is what the “nice” girl at the store talked me into. I really really hate when the sales associates are helpful. Like, leave me alone or be mean so I’ll get what I need and exit stage left. But no! They want to be super helpful and suggest things they think you’ll like and then you buy the whole store plus things you don’t need because you’re only “$10 away from the free gift with purchase” when you only need ONE $15 ITEM. This is the story of my life. #insertnameofboybandthatsangthatsong #notknowingtheirnamedidntstopmefromhashtagging

So the big Lavande bottle is their Lavender Eau De Cologne. It’s what that oh-so-helpful girl suggested. It’s delicious. Like I’ve been spraying on myself, my pillow, my clothes, etc. I even convinced myself that it makes me more likable- mainly because I like me more when I smell like lavender- so I sprayed it on myself when I went for an interview recently. I’ll let you know if I get it.

Now, check out all this stuff they gave me tho!

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Left to right, here we go.

Amande Shower Oil– This shower oil transforms, when in contact with water, into a delicate foam that gently cleanses the body. Enriched with almond oil, it respects the hydrolipidic film and leaves a subtle and mouth-watering scent of fresh almond, for a delightful skin!

Shea Butter Hand Cream– Enriched with 20% Shea Butter, this super-creamy balm penetrates quickly to protect, nourish and moisturize hands. Honey, almond extracts and coconut oil are blended with Shea Butter to create this extremely effective formula. The rich texture leaves hands soft and smooth with no oily traces, and can be applied as often as needed.

Roses et Reines– The Roses et Reines collection uses rose extract derived through enfleurage, a traditional process made innovative by the L’OCCITANE research team. The freshest of rose petals are steeped in oil, allowing it to become saturated with the natural fragrance of the rose, resulting in a fruitier scent.

Savon Bonne Mere– The Bonne Mere Rose Soap gently cleanses the skin without drying. Our formula contains a sustainable and eco-friendly palm oil which is RSPO certified. Pampered daily, skin is soft, supple and lightly scented.

So I just copied that info from the website. Sue me. I also got that cute little gingham with little roses mini-tote. That cute little Merci card is filled with more yummies.

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There are four samples here but I feel the need to admit that there were six. The missing two were a shampoo and conditioner that I have already used and now feel the need to buy. So. THANKS A LOT IMPECCABLE CUSTOMER SERVICE!

Meanwhile, I’m pretty sure this is the wordiest post I’ve ever written because as I type this sentence, I and surpassing 900 words.

Love the CRAP outta everything!


PS I know I know, I’m still typing. The thing is that since I was writing and linking to the L’Occitane website I was perusing the L’Occitane website and now I have more complaints. They have an option to “auto-replenish” my Lavande Eau de Cologne every six months and they won’t charge me shipping.Apparently, they’re ALLS about doing ME favors. *rolling eyes*


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